Idk

I don't care what the world think.
Or at least I'll try not to.

You think that you're my bestfriend, but despite my continuous protest that I don't have a BFF, I don't think you believe me.
You see, I'm not going to be contend to the fact that I probably will be your 11th bestfriend in the whole wide world. What I care is that there are 10 other people you consider to be more commanding on our little friendship-ladder. I know that I would probably hate you for a really long time if our "quality time" got sidelines by a call from your "bestest friends" and then pack up and leave me here by myself. Again.

I put you and others, maybe, before myself. I'll do things for you others wouldn't ever think of. And yet, the next time you receive a call from B telling you she has another emergency and that she need to talk to you ASAP when you were with me, after which, you'd turn around and say "You understand, don't you?" and leave me here. Only to find you text me 30 minutes later, "I'm bored. How r u?"

Abandonment.

I think the only reason why you do that is that you know for sure that I'll be here, no matter what; that you can not talk to me for 2 months and, bam!, we're having lunch and frapps. I think I've become passive partner and be happy with the fact that you've decided to spend some precious time away from your abusive roommate and those "emergencies" so that we can catch up.

I told you from the beginning that I'm not needy. Maybe I was wrong to give you that buffer to fall back on. Maybe I was wrong from the beginning to think I was ready for a non-bestfriend bestfriend.

Maybe